Mainstream Media Fearmongering

The mainstream media exploiting a naive public is nothing extraordinarily noteworthy since such occurrences are commonplace. Yet, every once and awhile, they offend me; which is quite a feat considering my tough skin and irreverent sense of humor. Unfortunately, they found my sacred com: energy drinks.
If you happened to find yourself on the MSN homepage today you may have been directed to this video of The Morning Show.
The clip warns parents of the imminent danger posed by popular drinks like Redbull, Rockstar, and Monster. We are told that an epidemic has erupted amongst teens who enjoy the "caffeine high" and even get "drunk on caffeine." Even though the clip admits that a grande cup of Starbucks coffee contains over four times the amount of caffeine in an eight ounce Redbull, an expert informs that "kids are downing 2,3,5 of these a day."

I'm serious. She really says that....Sure, there are young people abusing energy drinks and taking insane amounts daily but such instances do not accurately reflect the average teen consumer. How many high schoolers can even afford to drink five Redbulls in a day? I swear, if some teenage guy in BFE anally rapes a mountain goat the media will preach of a goat raping epidemic amongst teens to draw attention. This hyperbole was, sadly, not the worst of this horrible piece of reporting.

Not concerned with the actual contents of energy drinks? Not so fast, according to a writer for the New York Times interviewed on the video, the health effects of energy drinks could be the least of a parent's worries. After all, she claims that energy drinks are associated with "risky behavior" and are a "red flag for parents." If you observe your son or daughter consuming an Amp or Monster make sure to find out "who they are spending time with" and "how they are spending time on Friday nights." That's right, if your kid drinks Redbull when you are looking he or she is snorting crushed up Ritalin when you are not. Give me a break.

This alleged correlation is absurd. "High risk behavior" is not "associated" with energy drinks so much as it is associated with being young. Teens enjoy stunts, whether they drink Sobe Adrenaline or SunnyD.

How should the scourge of these drinks be stopped? Well, just ask mommy government to step in, what else? The article notes that Rockstar displays its amount of caffeine on the can and that "some think that the FDA should require all companies to do that." Sound reasonable? Well if you are even vaguely aware of the history of government intervention in the market, you are likely skeptical.

If energy drink companies were coerced into displaying the amount of caffeine their products contain it could cause the average potency of energy drinks to increase. How? In the market currently, an energy drink can compete with a high level of caffeine or it can utilize other factors like price and image. Those that do not focus on the caffeine level refraine from such display. Thus, if all of these drinks were required by law to advertise this information competition of caffeine levels would artificially rise. Energy drinks with low levels of caffeine would be passed up for those with relatively higher levels and the low level drinks would be forced to rise as an inadverten consequence of the requirement. Of course, government junkies rarely think of-or admit- inadvertent consequences.